Tuesday, June 24, 2008

And We Thought Bake Sales Would Provide a Political Benefit

The recent comments by McCain top advisor Charlie Black that another terrorist attack within the United States would provide a political benefit to McCain were reprehensible. However, they did get me thinking – what other horrible catastrophe would help out the political aspirations of the current Republican nominee?

1. A massive earthquake along the San Andreas Fault, causing California to sink into the Pacific Ocean would really help McCain politically.

2. Repeal of the 13th Amendment would be a political boon to Johnny Walnuts (and heck, while we are at it, let’s get rid of the 19th Amendment, too).

3. Hitler coming back from the dead with a legion of SS stormtroopers would enhance John McCain’s political cachet.

4. The abolition of our constitutional democracy, the ascension of King George the First, and anointment as the crown prince of America would give Prince John a political leg up.

5. Obama contracting leprosy from illegal immigrants would strengthen McCain’s political bid.

Feel free to add your own horrific story of death and destruction, and you too could work for the McCain campaign (that is, once you also become a registered lobbyist).


jjv said...

Charlie Black had what we call a Kinsleyite gaff. He said something true but impolitic. The point, is that the Dali 'Bama is not the guy you want if you need to use the pointy end of the spear. Also, I think you are wrong on three and four. Obama would quickly pledge to meet with Hitler without preconditions to obtain peace in our time, and GWB I would declare Jeb his successor.

BTW, I think Charlie Black missed a step by not adding, "Especially if the terrorist was one of Obama's relatives or long time friends."

Anonymous said...

Why so Black, Lietzy? All McCain really needs to do is promise Americans a beer (or even better a case or keg of beer) in every pot, courtesy of his lovely wife, Cindy.

J. said...

P.S. Hey JJV, don't we have enough Muslim-baiting going on without you having to aid and abet guys like Black? And if anyone were (was?) to attack the U.S. before the election, it would be just more proof that the Bush Administrations policies had failed, miserably.

Dave S. said...

J, I believe JJV prefers the term "Mohammedan" or occasionally "Saracen."

jjv said...

J, a religion whose adherents in disturbing numbers keep blowing up Americans, state they are bent on world domination, want to kill all the Jews, tax and abuse non-Muslims in their midst, cut off womens' clitori (aren't they hard enough to find as it is?), and, critically, BAN ALCOHOL have not been baited enough.

After 9/11 the first thing every politician did was act as if the Moslems were the injured parties. As if. Of course, most Moslems don't do any of this but its not like there is a huge ground swell against it within Moslem countries or constituencies. I think its incumbment on Moslems to explain themselves to the rest of us and not caterwaul like mild criticism makes them a bunch of Japanese interned by FDR and Earn Warren.

Before 9/11 I was pro-Muslim for an American. Facts on the ground since then make me less so.

I no longer carry a St. Christopher medal when traveling. I simply have one of St. James the Moor Slayer and hope for the best.

Lietzy said...

Now JJV, why would you make a comment like "especially if the terrorists are Obama's friends and relatives?" If I made the same comment about McCain, would it have any resonance? No, of course it wouldn't. And why not?

Methinks maybe you doth protest too much re: the racial dog whistles.

jjv said...

Well it would have no resonance because McCain is not related to Mohammedens (who are the chief perpetrators of terrorism) nor is he bosom buddies with radical Leftists who attempted to bomb the pentagon and other American sites. Obama has both of these attributes. If McCain's family had prominent IRA connections and the guy who started him in politics was an abortion clinic bomber we would hear about it and there would be no "dog whistle" nonsense.