And You Want to Be My A-League Farm Team...

Following up on an earlier post, Seinfeld Night didn't turn out so well for the home team, which turned in a Brazil-like performance to lose 18-2 to the Aberdeen Iron Birds (formerly the Utica Blue Sox, whose Irsay-esque spiriting away to northeast Maryland* is the only black mark** on the otherwise sainted*** Cal Ripken).

In related news, NBC had a backup plan in case Hernandez failed to produce. That would have been a good show in and of itself as opposed to one of the greatest hours of television ever broadcast.

*The only true part of that is the move. It was all above-board, Cal built an awesome park for the team plus miniature ballparks for his affiliated Little League teams whose beneficence Bryan has experienced first hand we love you Cal!

**Cheerfully withdrawn.

***Guy's a total saint.

I can see you bending over a hot stove. But I can't see the hot stove.

Congratulations to Bryce Harper and Davey Johnson for picking up NL Rookie and NL Manager of the Year respectively. That takes a little of the sting out of the way the season ended. It would have been nice to have Gio get the Cy Young but Dickey had an outstanding season, so hats off to him.

Earlier today I was made aware of this great countdown clock to the day pitchers and catchers report for spring training. I wanted to pass it along, but also realized that we have been shockingly deficient in Nats material on the blogrolls. Therefore, I have set up a Natitude! link list at right, to include the clock and the Nats homepage. If there's anything else you feel should go there, kindly let me know.

Teach Your Children Well

Last Sunday Laura graciously consented to watching the Nats-Phillies game while we ate a late dinner after tucking the kids in for the evening. As occasionally happens, Fiona wandered back downstairs and snuggled down for a bout of bedtime procrastination. At that moment Jayson Werth came up to bat and got the usual warm welcome Philly fans reserve for him (and Santa Claus*). Fiona was a bit taken aback and asked why everyone was booing. My response was basically as follows:

"Jayson Werth used to play for Philadelphia so the fans are booing him because Philadelphia fans are awful people."

This drew a look of surprise from Laura, who lived in Philly for a few years (but was never a Phillies fan, because she is not an awful person), so I elaborated.

"When Jayson Werth broke his wrist in a game against the Phillies in Nationals Park, the Phillies fans in attendance cheered as he was taken off the field. These are awful people. That is the objective truth."

I have to say that was one of my prouder moments as a father. We get so few opportunities to impart the wisdom of the ancients, so when the stars/children/sporting events align like that we must act on our responsibility to the young to remind them that we have always been at war with the Phillies and their objectively awful fans.

*Yeah, that's old stale news, but 1) look at the subhead of this blog and 2) screw Philly fans, they own that.

At Last, It Can Be Said

Until a few minutes ago I had been rigorously adhering to the Tao of Mora, expressed thusly:



Not any more, though.

PLAYOFFSPLAYOFFSPLAYOFFSWOOOOOPLAYOFFS!!!!!1!!!!!

Yeah, I'm excited.

NL East pennant discussion lockdown still in full effect.

The Agony of (Repeated, Extra-Innings) Defeat

Coming into Monday night's game against our own Washington Nationals, the Houston Astros had reeled off a scorching 4 wins in their last 34 games. Then, after tying the NL East-leading Nats in the bottom of the ninth, this happened:


A full breakdown of the breakdown is in this must-read piece, including a tremendous analysis of how the kid shown in the stands became a teenager that night. (No, not like that. Sheesh.) Fortunately, the Astros had set the franchise record for low attendance, managing to just break 13,000, so by the time that happened that particular stretch of infield was more densely populated than the stands so fans were spared the sight of that actually happening.

Then, last night, Houston had the tying and winning runs on base and this happened (sorry, couldn't embed).

If I'm Davey Johnson, I put Bernardina on the mound tonight and get a perfect game out of it.